This is for all the happy rappers
Who have real nice deals
And have no idea what it's like to work this hard and still break even..
I'm aware I'm a little nuts, and I know I'm a headcase
Unpredictable moods are a toll that the stress takes
I carry the world's weight tlil my shoulders and neck ache
And my sanity be going downhill like a sled race
All day my legs shake, like a nervous tick
This Adderall don't work for shit, it only gives me thoughts that got me worried sick
Feelings are so bottled up, the cork is decomposin'
And if this shit gets opened, it'll cause a damn explosion
With overflowing emotions that I kept pushed down
Like it was someone I was trying to drown, I know it now
I'm a little tightly strung and see I know I need to find a doctor
And a therapist and a shaman who got some ayahuasca
'Cause surviving in this game that's full of irritants
Has got me wonderin' if I'll make it, my greatest fear is this
So when you hear this shit, you'll hear the hunger
As I'm trying to stay financially afloat and keep appearances
'Cause I've been in this middle ground, people say I made it
But there's so many that still don't know what my name is
It's hard to get a grasp on where I stand up in this game
And all I know is that I wouldn't be this broke if I was famous
'Cause shit, I'm almost thirty, and still I feel like such a mess
I added fuel to the fire until I had nothing left
Under stress, with a life full of emptiness
Giving my all, and not a penny less
In this middle ground, wondering if I'mma ever blow
Middle ground, tearing at the fabric of my soul
Middle ground, feeling like I'm stuck up in the whole
And these insecurities follow every where I go
Middle ground, feeling like I'm barely gettin' by
Middle ground, second guessing why I even try
Middle ground, all I know how to do is survive
So mad that I wanna scream, so sad that I wanna cry
I'm sick of felling like I still got shit to prove to you
What? I gotta go on Sway again for a salute from you?
Go pull some dumb publicisty stunt shot by a movie crew
Just to be in the same conversation of all these newer dudes
All my life I've been fighting to be accepted
And when I'm not I can't help but to be affected
Unfairly percepted, people making assumptions
Off my melotonin levels and the state that I'm reppin'
Like I'm some kind of spoiled one-percenter, go and get the facts
Shit, I'm the product of a hard working middle-class
Just 'cause I wasn't bustin' a pistol or flippin' crack
Doesn't mean I don't got a story worthy of written raps
I'm getting by though, there's Kibble up in Moose's dish
It's better than it use to be, but see the truth is this
I re-invest almost everything in this music shit
You think I'd still live at my parents if I was rich?
Really? See I'm just trying to keep my business intact
My sanity come second to these lyrics that I rap
Chainsmoking from stress, but at 10 dollars a pack
I'm killing myself and killing my pockets with every drag
Fuck it, I'mma keep on pushing though because I deserve the glory
I got an army of fans that would murder for me
I do this shit for them until the whole planet has heard my story
Reporting live from Purgatory
In this middle ground, wondering if I'mma ever blow
Middle ground, tearing at the fabric of my soul
Middle ground, feeling like I'm stuck up in the whole
And these insecurities follow every where I go
Middle ground, feeling like I'm barely gettin' by
Middle ground, second guessing why I even try
Middle ground, all I know how to do is survive
So mad that I wanna scream, so sad that I wanna cry
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